A beginnings end...

It’s not often that I wake up at the leisurely hour of ten o’clock with absolutely nothing on my agenda; no place to go, no people to meet, no sights to see. My schedule looks like this for the foreseeable future; I don’t have a job at the moment or know when I’ll be starting the next one, and my family and immediate friends have all left the area for a measurable period of time. It would be easy for me to avoid this period of uncertainty—if only I knew what I wanted to do next!

Moments like these are rare. Many people dream of this, having nothing pressing, nothing stressing to deal with. I find it a bit daunting.

I like having projects and goals and things to do. I despise being borred. But, as many things in this world exist in opposition, in order to have jam-packed fun-filled moments in life, we also must have times of transition for rest. I suppose, now is the time to recharge.

Funnily enough, this sleepy period often comes to my surprise.

There was a time my goal was to master 360’s on my snowboard. A group of friends and I would go hike the small kicker in Bwana and throw our best spin tricks. Amusingly, I would always make a noise when I jumped: a fun yell, a little scream, a surprised “Whoo!” It snuck out out my mouth every time, like it was some big surprise that I was in the air. But, I knew how high I was going to be in the air. I knew how long it’d last. I knew how far I’d go. But, everytime, the same surprised scream let out.

In that same way, every year, the season’s end comes as a surprise. I know it’s coming. I know when it’s coming. I know how long it will last. But every year, the season's end comes as a surprise, and I find myself scrambling around going: shit, what am I going to do now?

I have thus become a hard core researcher to answer this problem. I’ve surfed the web non-stop; until my fingers were blue, my eyes heavy, vision impaired, my butt cheeks tingling and asleep. I have explored a number of possibilities: teaching English in South Korea, teaching English in another country, finding a job or traveling in Africa, finding a real job. But, as a result of my research, I have come to realize there is no obvious choice. I like it when choices are made easy. This one, it not.

All I have to show for my week at home is, hmmm, nothing! I did have an awesome week though, visiting old friends from childhood, high school, and CBS4 (thanks for fitting me in!). Sadly though, my problem remains unresolved...